Uhhh, haha. Well, that's a heck of a question, but uh. I dunno! I guess, like...
[He counts off on his fingers as he starts his list, glancing up at the ceiling like the answers are floating above him or something.]
Well, your fav color is blue, you're a sick lightning wizard that uses talisman magic, you smell like mint, you used to sleep with six guys, you're like 5'9", you have a wife, you have some kinda beef with King Arthur-- a bunch of other stuff, but uh...
[Places his hands in his lap and blinking those big blue eyes at him like he really doesn't have a clue what this is about--]
I mean... I think you're gonna have to be a little more specific.
[That... comes out instantly before he straightens himself out again.
...Then clears his throat and finally, if not awkwardly, sits in that spot Hanna offered him earlier.]
And I don't have any beef with him, he's just my idiot friend. I mean- No! NO! That is absolutely not what I came here to talk about! I'm talking about what you said earlier, during that night we were all being ridiculous. What do you know about me?!
[He winces a bit with the correction, but it the flicking of his ears indicates that it's more of a volume issue than anything actually concerning.]
Ah-- oh... yeah. That.
[He too clears his throat, scooting back a bit and pulling his legs up to cross in front of him so he can rest his elbows upon his knees.]
I'ma be honest with you, I was really just kinda going along with the story? At least, the way it's told in my world. But there's so many different universes and so many retellings of that particular fairy tale that it's super possible that I don't know squat about you!
They're on the same page now AND Merlin hasn't been forced to admit anything just yet. So far...so good. Merlin settles down just a little, noticeably more relaxed and not nearly as...prickly. He's sure he'll have a reason to be on edge again soon, but that just comes with the territory.]
Yeah, I, uh, noticed that when everyone started calling me an old man. But this story...how does it go in your world?
[He winces, but at least this time it's a sympathy wince.]
Yeah, uh. I imagine your story isn't quite complete without her, huh.
[He sighs and settles back against his headboard, crossing his arms beneath his chest while he delves through his mental library for this fairy tale.]
Ssso, uh. Snow White's story, in my world, it's called "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs"--Dwarves? Dwarfs. I-- I dunno which one it is-- Eh, anyway, it involves her being a kind-hearted and beautiful girl who sings to animals and they all flock to her to help her clean the cottage she shares with the seven dwarves and decorate her pies and there's a mean old witch who is jealous of her beauty and goes and feeds her a nasty apple and--
[He lifts a hand to tap his chin thoughtfully.] Well, I kinda forget what happens after that. It's been like a million years since I saw the movie.
[As Hanna explains the story, Merlin finds himself opening and closing his mouth repeatedly, as if he wants to correct him with every sentence, but then chooses it's better not to interrupt. Well, kind-hearted and beautiful is right, but....sings to animals? Maybe she could do that...if she felt like it. Although he sure didn't see any animals flock to her, unless the bunny counts... And a cottage?? SHARING??? It all just sorta becomes similar-but-not-quite from there, Hanna didn't even mention the tree thing.
The tree thing never leaves you.]
Maya tried to explain it to me earlier, but she didn't believe the dwarves had any names. Is that true?
There's uhhh... Happy and Dopey aaaand Doc. That's three.
[Once again, counting on his fingers.]
Uh. ...Sleepy? Uhhh... Oh! Grumpy! and... Giddy? Silly? No, it's more like... Flirty. Or Shy, but it's not "Shy" What's another word for "shy--" Bashful. Bashful aaaand.
Ugh, c'mon, I almost got'em! [He's just wracking his brain here to remember-- give him a sec.]
Surely Hanna is joking, those aren't even names he's listing. But the more adjectives he lists, the more it becomes apparent that he's being serious, and Merlin is left trying to figure out which one of his friends is supposedly Dopey. Which one is he supposed to be?!
Who is writing these stories?!]
No, stop! STOP! That's quite alright, those are definitely not their names!!
[Ah, finally, a target. When he has time, he'll have to destroy this....Disney person.
But more importantly, Merlin glances towards the door again, making sure there aren't any sudden Maya's that might be overhearing. With a sigh, he turns back to Hanna, looking as seriously as he can about such a subject matter. His words from earlier still live rent-free in his head, he knows Hanna is trying to spare his feelings.]
Don't play dumb with me, Hanna. You know exactly why I know their names....don't you?
Augh, alright, fine. Yes, I'm sorry, I thought you were one of the seven dwarf-ves! It's just-- all the pieces fell in place and it sounded a lot like the story I'd heard and I got too excited! I-- It just.
[Groans, ruffling his kelpy curls in frustration.] I wasn't trying to make fun of you or anything, I just got way ahead of myself. I shoulda asked mono-y-mono, man to man, and not like, put you on the spot like that. It sucked, and I'm sorry.
That's...a genuine apology, isn't it? Wow! Wow, alright then, looks like this is really happening, Merlin can't not tell Hanna if he's going to apologize like that, huh? With another heavy sigh, Merlin double checks the door one last time before looking up at Hanna with the most pathetic eyes.]
I- listen. It's alright. I only got testy because you aren't......entirely wrong. [Oooooohhhkay, he can do this. Maybe. A part of him feels like he can back out quickly and just yell sike, but then he'll just have to keep living with constantly guessing if Hanna believed that or not. Perhaps if he gave himself the reassurance...] What I'm about to say, I'm begging you to PLEASE keep between us. Lord knows Maya looks for any opportunity to push me off my pedestal, she would ABSOLUTELY tear me apart if she knew....
...but...I may have just gotten over a particularly nasty curse before arriving here. So I'm a little.........sensitive.
[Oh, well that's got his attention. He sits up straighter, scooting forward a bit so he can speak low and keep this hush-hush, as requested.]
A curse that turned you into a dwarf?? That makes way more sense than some girl living with a bunch of little old men! Like, that's a way more compelling story--
[Not...the reaction he was expecting and Merlin can feel his face flush at Hanna's sudden excitement in his misery. Of course, this only means his face gets even greener instead of a typical blush, which in turn only makes him feel worse because IT'S ALWAYS GREEN, AIN'T IT?!]
Wha- It is NOT compelling, it was humiliating!!
[Merlin hisses much like a cat would when presented the entire face of a horse.]
I'll have you know I was like that for over a year! We all were! We were so ashamed, we had to go live out in the woods. ...Which, speaking as both a human and a nymph, was actually quite pleasant. BUT STILL!! We had missing posters, Hanna!! It was a whole thing!!
[...well shit, guess it's time for even more confessions. Merlin chuckles awkwardly, the kind of chuckle that drips with guilt.]
Ah, no, actually... This was the, um, faerie...princess...?
[He isn't about to bring up his earlier faerie freak out and something tells him he doesn't have to. All the pieces, here they are. Hanna's been good about solving everything so far.]
Funny story, I may have mistook her as a witch, so...you were close!
...You don't say? If only I got some sort of retribution for my horrible actions. Some sort of cruel punishment to teach me a valuable life lesson. A curse, if you will.
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momijizukamori
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[He counts off on his fingers as he starts his list, glancing up at the ceiling like the answers are floating above him or something.]
Well, your fav color is blue, you're a sick lightning wizard that uses talisman magic, you smell like mint, you used to sleep with six guys, you're like 5'9", you have a wife, you have some kinda beef with King Arthur-- a bunch of other stuff, but uh...
[Places his hands in his lap and blinking those big blue eyes at him like he really doesn't have a clue what this is about--]
I mean... I think you're gonna have to be a little more specific.
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[That... comes out instantly before he straightens himself out again.
...Then clears his throat and finally, if not awkwardly, sits in that spot Hanna offered him earlier.]
And I don't have any beef with him, he's just my idiot friend. I mean- No! NO! That is absolutely not what I came here to talk about! I'm talking about what you said earlier, during that night we were all being ridiculous. What do you know about me?!
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Ah-- oh... yeah. That.
[He too clears his throat, scooting back a bit and pulling his legs up to cross in front of him so he can rest his elbows upon his knees.]
I'ma be honest with you, I was really just kinda going along with the story? At least, the way it's told in my world. But there's so many different universes and so many retellings of that particular fairy tale that it's super possible that I don't know squat about you!
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Okay.
They're on the same page now AND Merlin hasn't been forced to admit anything just yet. So far...so good. Merlin settles down just a little, noticeably more relaxed and not nearly as...prickly. He's sure he'll have a reason to be on edge again soon, but that just comes with the territory.]
Yeah, I, uh, noticed that when everyone started calling me an old man. But this story...how does it go in your world?
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Okay, a little rude and hurtful. ...N-Not at you, of course, but whoever is writing these stories.
I meant Snow's.
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Yeah, uh. I imagine your story isn't quite complete without her, huh.
[He sighs and settles back against his headboard, crossing his arms beneath his chest while he delves through his mental library for this fairy tale.]
Ssso, uh. Snow White's story, in my world, it's called "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs"--Dwarves? Dwarfs. I-- I dunno which one it is-- Eh, anyway, it involves her being a kind-hearted and beautiful girl who sings to animals and they all flock to her to help her clean the cottage she shares with the seven dwarves and decorate her pies and there's a mean old witch who is jealous of her beauty and goes and feeds her a nasty apple and--
[He lifts a hand to tap his chin thoughtfully.] Well, I kinda forget what happens after that. It's been like a million years since I saw the movie.
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The tree thing never leaves you.]
Maya tried to explain it to me earlier, but she didn't believe the dwarves had any names. Is that true?
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There's uhhh... Happy and Dopey aaaand Doc. That's three.
[Once again, counting on his fingers.]
Uh. ...Sleepy? Uhhh... Oh! Grumpy! and... Giddy? Silly? No, it's more like... Flirty. Or Shy, but it's not "Shy" What's another word for "shy--" Bashful. Bashful aaaand.
Ugh, c'mon, I almost got'em! [He's just wracking his brain here to remember-- give him a sec.]
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Surely Hanna is joking, those aren't even names he's listing. But the more adjectives he lists, the more it becomes apparent that he's being serious, and Merlin is left trying to figure out which one of his friends is supposedly Dopey. Which one is he supposed to be?!
Who is writing these stories?!]
No, stop! STOP! That's quite alright, those are definitely not their names!!
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[Snickering.]
So, you know the dwar...ves... actual names, then? That's pretty cool.
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But more importantly, Merlin glances towards the door again, making sure there aren't any sudden Maya's that might be overhearing. With a sigh, he turns back to Hanna, looking as seriously as he can about such a subject matter. His words from earlier still live rent-free in his head, he knows Hanna is trying to spare his feelings.]
Don't play dumb with me, Hanna. You know exactly why I know their names....don't you?
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...Iiii mean, there's all kindsa reasons! I don't want to presume--
[Except he already has and he was so, so right.]
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[Bestie please don't toy with him.]
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Augh, alright, fine. Yes, I'm sorry, I thought you were one of the seven dwarf-ves! It's just-- all the pieces fell in place and it sounded a lot like the story I'd heard and I got too excited! I-- It just.
[Groans, ruffling his kelpy curls in frustration.] I wasn't trying to make fun of you or anything, I just got way ahead of myself. I shoulda asked mono-y-mono, man to man, and not like, put you on the spot like that. It sucked, and I'm sorry.
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That's...a genuine apology, isn't it? Wow! Wow, alright then, looks like this is really happening, Merlin can't not tell Hanna if he's going to apologize like that, huh? With another heavy sigh, Merlin double checks the door one last time before looking up at Hanna with the most pathetic eyes.]
I- listen. It's alright. I only got testy because you aren't......entirely wrong. [Oooooohhhkay, he can do this. Maybe. A part of him feels like he can back out quickly and just yell sike, but then he'll just have to keep living with constantly guessing if Hanna believed that or not. Perhaps if he gave himself the reassurance...] What I'm about to say, I'm begging you to PLEASE keep between us. Lord knows Maya looks for any opportunity to push me off my pedestal, she would ABSOLUTELY tear me apart if she knew....
...but...I may have just gotten over a particularly nasty curse before arriving here. So I'm a little.........sensitive.
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[Oh, well that's got his attention. He sits up straighter, scooting forward a bit so he can speak low and keep this hush-hush, as requested.]
A curse that turned you into a dwarf?? That makes way more sense than some girl living with a bunch of little old men! Like, that's a way more compelling story--
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Wha- It is NOT compelling, it was humiliating!!
[Merlin hisses much like a cat would when presented the entire face of a horse.]
I'll have you know I was like that for over a year! We all were! We were so ashamed, we had to go live out in the woods. ...Which, speaking as both a human and a nymph, was actually quite pleasant. BUT STILL!! We had missing posters, Hanna!! It was a whole thing!!
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I'm real sorry that happened to you guys... it must have been really hard.
[But he can't stop himself from digging for a little more information, as always.]
...Was it the witch that did it to you?
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Ah, no, actually... This was the, um, faerie...princess...?
[He isn't about to bring up his earlier faerie freak out and something tells him he doesn't have to. All the pieces, here they are. Hanna's been good about solving everything so far.]
Funny story, I may have mistook her as a witch, so...you were close!
Aaaaaaand I attacked her.
........a lot.
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Look, I'm sorry-- it's a lot to take in, okay!
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